August August

This month is truly August in the sense that there is an august feeling in the air. Hope you understand. Named after Augustus Caesar it marks the short duration between a hot summer and onset of a cool autumn.

My blog would be terribly incomplete if I did not mention Maslow's Pyramid which is mentioned earlier in my blog of Aug 2nd(I think). The Maslow's Pyramid is a concept in psychology which tries to explain our motivations are human beings. Our actions are driven by motivations some hidden and some transparent. Uncovering the motivations will enable us to understand and predict our behavior. This knowledge is key to psychologists who try to help trouble clients by gaining an understanding of their motivations.

The base of the pyramid is the Need For Survival. This motivates us to eat and hunt for food and run and hide in a cave for shelter etc., Higher up in the pyramid above the Base layer is the need for love and togetherness and companionship and being in group because through years of evolution we have come to realize that strength in numbers ensures survival and also it is easier to find a mate and procreate species.

The third of the 5 layers in the pyramid is about secruity for individual and family. This is what makes us buy a home and buy a security system and burglar alarm. This is what makes us buy a dog for protection. We want to secure our family and protect spouse and children.

The fourth layer is social standing and respect related. Arnold shwarzanegger is now Governor of California. He needed to not just exist in the US society as a citizen and tax paying resident and a father to his family and husband to his wife but he wanted a social standing. He wanted a position in the society where respect and admiration are given to him. This is the fourth layer. This is the same motivation that drives us to throw parties once we achieve success and have get-together gatherings and share the good fortune with others. Human beings someone dont seem satisfied in just being successful or wealthy. They need to show it off to society and be recognized and respected.

The fifth layer which is higher up in the Pyramid is the need for self actualization. This means that one knows oneself and is at peace with oneself. Ideally at this phase one should stop yearning for more wealth and seek a tranquil retirement. One should stop pursuing materialistic things and look forward to a peaceful twilight to their lives.


I was discussing all this with Rishi Sinha in BITS Pilani in my second year of college and I told him how I wanted to do so much in life. Be a writer or columnist for the Times of India newspaper, be a volunteer at the hospital, makes scientific discoveries, be a good family man and raise great kids, go to Africa and help them build a well or a school in some impoverished areas and i kept coming up with more and more ideas. I am bursting with enthusiasm.

Rishi listened. He has thick glasses and his eyes look small through them. He squinted once or twice at me and said, 'Prabhakar the tip of the Maslow's Pyramid need not be in the clouds'. I was stunned. To this day I remain stunned. That is the ultimate answer to the question, 'What is my purpose and what should I do'. What I should do depends on what motivates me and what motivates me need not be an earth-shattering lofty goal. A simple goal as going to work on time and doing a good professional job and coming home and depositing pay cheque in the bank and driving safely so that I am not a safety concern for others on the road and paying my tax and being a kind person and having a kind word to say to colleagues friends family members is enough. I dont need to discover another element on the periodic table to reach self-actualization. I am already self-actualized. I just need to realize it. Besides after death I will end up in an urn as ash. All my dreams, aspirations, desires, passions and the sum total of all my consciousness will end up in a jar as ash. Since I know the destination can I not live each moment in the present time with more happiness. Surely I can make more changes now than when I am sitting as ash in a jar. I dont need to win an Olympic Gold Medal or invent something like Laser or discover something like Plutonium or a new computer language like C++ or go to warn-torn Africa and help in defusing the landmines and win the Nobel prize for Peace or save the rain forests from timber logging and save the planet or work for Nasa and go on a space walk with some other astronauts. If I make a phone call right now to my mom and tell her how much I love her and ask her how her day is going I am self-actualized. If I notice my colleague waiting for the rain to stop because he has not brought his umbrella and I got one and I offer to walk him out to his car sharing my umbrella - I am self-actualized. If I complete my deadline at office and my whole team is happy and we get a good name from the Director of company appreciating us- I am self-acutalized. If I come home to my wife and kids and I spend time with my son showing him how to build a Lego set and I help my wife in the kitchen with the dishes-cleaning - I am self-actualized. I can be stuck down on the highway by an eighteen-wheeler truck tomorrow and my last thought in my consciousness would be that I mean no one ill-will and I lived a complete life. I can close my eyes and drift in the thick murky black oblivion. Will it be life after death. Will I be cremated and end up in a bottle as ash. Will God receive me in Heaven. The rest is shanthi shanthi shanthihi!